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Tuesday, July 26, 2011

How To Deal With A Breakup

Source : Ex Back System permits to republish here

It’s not always easy to get the best advice about how to deal with a breakup. People who have “been there and done that” are usually all too happy to tell you what to do and how to do it, but in the end, how to deal with a breakup is a very individual thing.

Because your relationship wasn’t like anyone else’s relationship, the breakup was unique, too. Even if it was over a common thing like cheating or your boyfriend just neglecting you, how you feel won’t be like how everyone else who’s had a breakup feels.

So the best way to figure out how to deal with a breakup is to really figure out how you feel. Some people will give you advice about how to get rid of everything that reminds you of the relationship. This can be good advice if it feels right for you.

Gifts he’s given you or pictures of the two of you might be better put away for a while. You don’t have to get rid of them forever, just put them in a box in the closet or in a drawer, out of sight.

This doesn’t mean you don’t ever want to see him again or that you don’t miss him. You could end up even being good friends. It simply means that it’s time to be easy on yourself. And not being reminded everywhere you look of your breakup can help make the time easier.

Let’s face it. Whether you were dumped or you broke up with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you feel pain whenever you’re reminded of the situation. And especially if it was a long-term relationship, you’re going to be reminded a lot. When you see places you went together or mutual friends, you can’t help but be reminded.

But when you’re at home, especially in your bedroom, you can try to give yourself a “safe haven” without blatant reminders of the relationship there to bring you down. Even if there’s no bitterness or anger involved with ending the relationship, there’s no reason to let it be on your mind more than it already is with photographs and mementos out in plain sight.

Maybe you’re angry and you’d really like to just throw away everything that reminds you of him. Think hard before you do this. Let the anger and the hurt fade before making any rash decisions. It can be painful figuring out how to deal with a breakup, but doing something you regret is definitely not the way to start.

If you patch things up or become friends, you’ll miss those photographs you had of the two of you having fun. He also might be very hurt to discover you threw away a gift he gave you, which can make it harder to maintain a good friendship.

Breakup is difficult. Everyone will tell you how to deal with a breakup, but you have to do the painful work of figuring out what’s best for you, yourself.
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