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Showing posts with label Save Marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Save Marriage. Show all posts

Monday, August 1, 2011

I Want To Save My Marriage But I Dont Know Where To Start

Source : Ex Back System permits to republish here

Do you say I want to save my marriage but don’t know where to start? This article looks at the factors that go into a marriage’s break up and helps you identify factors which will help you to save my marriage.

First of all, you need to look at the underlying issues. What is it that is causing problems? Some of these issues can be communication, money, and the stress of raising children. If you say that you want to save my marriage, first you must identify the core issues.

For some people, communication is at the heart of their marital strife. The daily stresses of life interfere with the kind of talking that lubricates a relationship. These couples need to make time to talk in order to save my marriage. There needs to be a time every day where you sit down and talk. Perhaps you can get up 15 minutes earlier and have breakfast together rather than grabbing a bagel at work. Or, get the kids to wash the dishes and take an after dinner walk. Whatever you need to do to have time to share the little details of the day is important.

But communication issues can go deeper than that. You may be avoiding big issues because they are too stressful. You may need to schedule a weekend away to work on your relationship. This can be a wise investment to save my marriage.

Other times, money is at the heart of marriage problems. Especially in these tough economic times, the lack of money to pay basic expenses can cause marriages to break up. Ironically, when marriages break up over these financial issues, there are actually fewer resources to support two households.

Sometimes there is a basic difference in philosophy about how money should be spent. For instance, some people believe that money should be saved for a rainy day. Others prefer an aggressive investment strategy. There are people who think money is meant to be enjoyed to buy nice things in the present. And, there are people who think nothing of going into debt to get the things they want. If you and your spouse have conflicting money styles, you can have relationship problems. If you’re saying I want to save my marriage, you need to have a discussion about money styles and come to a consensus about how resources are to be allocated.

Another source of stress in relationships is children. If you have different philosophies about how children should be raised, there can be endless discontent. If the kids know that a decision by one parent can be overridden by an appeal to the other parent, there is going to be stress on the marriage. If there is a difference of opinion on how discipline is to be carried out, you can expect problems.

Sit down and work out a parenting plan. Modify it as the children grow and their needs change. Again, communication is key in working out these issues with raising a family successfully.

It’s easy to become frustrated with your relationship in today’s complex world. But, if you are saying “I want to save my marriage,” work on these issues and you’ll find yourselves living like newlyweds again.
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Thursday, June 30, 2011

How Can I Save My Marriage A Six Step Approach

Source : Ex Back System permits to republish here

If you are wondering how can I save my marriage, you need to read every word in this article.  You are probably confused and frustrated right now.  You may instinctively lash out.  But this would be the wrong thing to do.  If you are wondering how can I save my marriage, you need to follow this six step approach. 

Saving a marriage that seems to have failed takes courage, determination, perseverance and patience.  It also takes a lot of love. 

But, when problems have cropped up in the marriage, it may take more than just love to heal the rift.  You should know that repairing the damage done in a relationship is easier said than done.  But remember that being straightforward and honest go a long way in making the marriage work again.

So, to keep harmony in your marriage and avoid divorce, you need to do the following six things.

1.  Try putting yourself in your spouse’s shoes when problems arise.  Think about things from his or her perspective.  If you are having yet another blow up about the dishes not being done after breakfast, think about how busy her schedule is in the morning.  Or, if he doesn’t seem to be at home for dinner most of the time, take into consideration that he may be working extra hours at the office to get a pay raise to help support the family better.

2. How can I save my marriage?  Stop the blame game.  Marriage is a two way street and every situation has had a contribution from both partners.  Before you blame your spouse, look at the things you may have contributed to the problem.  When you stop blaming one another, you avoid planting the seeds in an already  hurt relationship.

3. Deal with your own issues.  Too many times, a spouse will project their own problems onto their husband or wife.  If you have issues of your own, get counseling and work through them.  Don’t take them out on the one you love.

4.  Say “thank you” more.  Focus on all of the things your partner does right rather than what he or she does wrong.  Any time you find yourself criticizing, come up with two reasons to thank them within one hour.  When you are in the wrong, be big enough to say you’re sorry.

5. How can I save my marriage?  Make your spouse’s life easier in any way you can.  There are too many demands on people’s times these days.  Take some time to help your partner to relax by doing small things that let him or her know they are being cared for.

6. Build bonds whenever you can.  Look for activities, interests, and hobbies that you can enjoy doing together.  When you can build bonds through activities, it can help get you through a rocky stage of the relationship.  You can also build bonds by taking a couples only vacation.  Whether this is a two week trip to Europe or a night at a local campground, the experience of getting away alone can also strengthen the bonds of your relationship.

If you are wondering how can I save my marriage, follo
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w this six step plan.